5 Travel Insurance Jokes

Submitted by: Patrick Chong

In the post-9/11 age of failing travel operators, airport security checks and swine flu, travel insurance has become a serious business, so perhaps it s time to look at the lighter side of insurance. There was a time, perhaps two decades ago, when insurance agents were the butt of jokes the same way bank managers, stock brokers and politicians are vilified today. Let s revisit some of those old jokes and see if we can remember what we like to make fun of insurance salesmen, and why travel insurance used to be humorous.

Sleeping Alone

An accountant, a secretary and a travel insurance salesman are travelling together through a rural area. Tired, they drive up to a small country inn. The owner tells them he only has one room vacant with two beds, so somebody will have to sleep in the barn for the night. The secretary draws the short straw and heads out to the barn while the others go to sleep. In less than an hour they are woken up by a knock at the door. It’s the secretary, who complains, “There is a pig in the barn. I’m Jewish, and cannot sleep near an unclean beast.”

The accountant is ticked-off but gives up his spot and heads out to the barn. The other two go to bed but soon are woken up by another knock. It’s the accountant who has returned saying, “There is a cow in that barn. I’m a Hindu, and it would offend my beliefs to sleep next to a sacred beast.” The travel insurance salesman is aggravated and just wants to get some sleep so he walks over to the barn in a huff.

Some time goes by and the accountant and secretary fall fast asleep but they are woken up by a much louder pounding. They open the door and are surprised by what they see: The pig and the cow!

The Agent & The Genie

A travel insurance agent was walking along the beach when he found a bottle. When he rubbed it, there was a puff of smoke and a genie appeared.

“I will grant you three wishes,” announced the genie. “But I must warn you: since Satan hates me for my good deeds, for every wish you make, your rival will get the wish as well – only double.”

The travel insurance salesman thought about this for a while. “For my first wish, I would like ten million pounds,” he announced. Instantly, the genie gave him a Swiss bank account number and assured the man that $10,000,000 had been deposited. “But your rival has just received $20,000,000,” the genie said.

“I’ve always wanted a Ferrari,” the salesman said. Instantly a Ferrari appeared. “But your rival has just received two Ferraris,” the genie said. “And what is your last wish?”

“Well,” said the salesman, “I’ve always wanted to donate a kidney.”

The Manager & the Genie

Here’s the same joke again, pretty much, again characterising the brokers as dispassionate and ruthless in nature:

A sales rep, an administration clerk and their manager from the travel insurance office are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp on the street.

They rub it and a genie emerges in a puff of smoke. The genie says, “I usually only grant three wishes, so I’ll give each of you just one.”

“Me first! Me first!” says the admin clerk. “I wish I was in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.” Poof! She’s gone.

In astonishment, the travel insurance sales rep steps forward: “Me next! Me next! I wish I could be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse and an endless supply of Pina Coladas.” Poof! He’s gone, too.

“OK, you’re up,” the genie says to the manager.

The manager says, “I wish those two will be back in the office straight after lunch.”

Stranded Abroad

A travelling insurance salesman was held up by a bad storm in the Hawaiian Islands. He sent an e-mail to his corporate headquarters advising them that he was stranded for a few days and requested instructions.

The reply came back shortly: “Begin vacation as of yesterday.”

The Wisdom of Confucius

Clearly, these old bad jokes demonstrate that insurance is no laughing matter. We all know it is no joke when something goes wrong on holiday and you find yourself without travel insurance. The following witty aphorism attributed to Confucius says it all:

Needing travel insurance is like needing a parachute. If it isn’t there the first time, chances are you won’t be needing it again.

About the Author: Patrick Chong is the Managing Director of Journey s Travel. Their commercial travel insurance website, Insuremore, offers

travel insurance

for families, couples and singles with a quick and easy online claims feature.

Source:

isnare.com

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